Today is Ash Wednesday so I attended Mass today at noon. During the part of the Mass where we’ll be smeared with ash on our foreheads, the choir sang the song entitled “Maging Akin Muli” by Bubbles Bandojo and Arnel Aquino.
The first time I heard this song was about 2 years ago during our ministry’s Life in the Spirit Seminar Proper. I remember, when I heard that song, I cried so hard. I was going through a lot that time and I felt that, even if I was part of a ministry and had lots of friends there, I was so lonely. That song made me realize that I was looking for love and attention from the wrong people. There was this person who never left my side, who never gave up on me, who was so proud of me, who loves me and would always will, but it was I who never gave Him the attention He so desired from me. I felt He was calling me through that song. I felt so bad for forgetting about Him, for not seeking Him first, for hating Him at times. When will you come back to me, Noel?
Today, when I heard that song, I couldn’t help but cry a little bit. Thank God that there was big enough space between me and the person sitting next to me (I was at the very end of the pew). She must have thought I was so dramatic or something if she saw me crying. Anyway, those same feelings that I felt when I first heard that song all came back to me. I never gave God much attention these past few months. That’s why I decided to put up this blog, to force myself to reflect and somewhat feel obligated to reflect and post something for my readers (no matter how many or few they are).
Sometimes, even if you’re with a lot of people most of the time, you still feel lonely. Sometimes, you almost have everything in the world yet you’re not happy still. It’s because we desire earthly things. We look for happiness at the wrong places (and people). Material things, places, activities, even friends and family become our idols and our false gods. We must remember that as Christians, without Christ, it’s IAN: I Am Nothing–we are nothing. We should seek God above everything. Seek the Giver than the gift. Seek the Healer before the healing. Seek THE Lover before a lover (haha). Seek the…well, you get the idea.
So here’s a video of the song. It’s, of course, a Tagalog song. I posted the lyrics below as well. I can try to translate the lyrics into English but the meaning or impact of the lyrics might change if I do so. Listen to it and be blessed! =D
Manlamig man sa Akin puso mong maramdamin
Lisanin man ng tuwa puso mong namamanglaw
Manginig man sa takot masindakin mong puso
Mag-ulap man sa lungkot diwa mong mapag-imbot.
Kapiling mo Akong laging naghihintay sa tanging tawag mo.
Pag-ibig Kong ito isang pananabik sa puso Ko
Sa ‘yong pagbabalik sa piling Kong puspos ng pagsuyo
Manahimik at makinig ka’t maging Akin muli.
Di mo rin akalain tinig mo’y hanap Ko rin,
Ang ‘yong tuwa at sakit, Aking galak at pait.
Kung lingid pa sa iyo, Aking pakikiloob,
Tuklasin mong totoo: tunay mong pagkatao.