This devotion I’ve been doing lately is becoming a lot harder to keep. I’ve been coming in late in Masses, sometimes forgetting to read the daily readings and to pray before I sleep, and writing my daily reflections. I’m always tired lately despite having a lot of sleep. I’m a bit depressed and irritable at times. I don’t know what is causing me to fail. I know I said in my last post that God deserves more from me.
Just because I know that keeping this devotion gets harder everyday doesn’t mean I have good enough reasons to justify my lapses.
Last Sunday, I attended this worship service at a different church. I got a bit teary-eyed at one of the songs they sang. I miss those moments – losing yourself in praise and worship; crying your heart out because of all the pain and being overwhelmed by God’s love. Every week, I attend our community’s worship service. I’m also part of the praise team. Still, I never get to experience that special moment with the Lord. Perhaps those worship services lack the heart. Maybe I lack the heart. I know what I want. I just don’t know how or where to get it.
“There’s a cry in my heart
For Your glory to fall
For Your presence to fill up my senses
There’s a yearning again
A thirst for discipline
A hunger for things that are deeper”
- Cry In My Heart by Starfield
Be the blessing! It’s cool being spiritual!